I wish...

Yeah, it does look like I'm keeping this pace of a-post-a-month, I wish I could do better though.

So much had happened for the past month:  Phuket trip on a long weekend, ... um... and we (my dbf--dear bf--moved to a much smaller apartment) well, not that much happened, actually.

We found out the hard way that we'd been living in a poisonous environment, me felt dizzy and nauseous every morning and unable to focus the whole day at work; my dbf couldn't breathe and couldn't focus, finally his doctor found that he had way too high rate of freon (the liquid put in the air-con that cools the room when you turn on your air-con).  So we decided to leave.  We like the building but they haven't got a bigger room, so we decided to move to a smaller room but in a much better environment--opposite side of the building means we can open our balcony door to absolutely no noisy vehicle side of the building at night.  It's a big improvement, we agreed.

Living in BKK is quite hard when you go around you don't seem to find any area with clean air, except when you're on the river.  If I could make a wish now and it would be granted, I'd wish that I had 10 more granted wishes hehe :)  Well, seriously, I wish that we were all without sufferings, for each individuals.  Too big a dream!

I dreamt of my late father the other night.  It seemed so real, we were walking along a dark street, under the rain.  He was clutching my right arm (he appeared old and frail) and he kept asking me questions about my well-being:  if I'd been fine, if I wanted to give it another try for another PhD (yeah, I decided to leave the one I was accepted...long story, some other time for this).  He pulled out an umbrella that was big enough for both of us, I held the umbrella and he continued to clutch my arm.  We would continue to stroll and talk but then my alarm went off!!!  Uh!!!!  I wish that could happen in real, that my father would clutch at my arm while I held an umbrella for both of us.  I wish I had more time to talk to him when he was still alive.  *sigh*

hmmmm  Better end this one with a more delighted note of this photo of Harry and Potter when they were little :)

Until the next time.

Love,
Jittra :)

A month and so..lag.

So I left my bosses, I went to Spain and came back for a new job :)  All in the past month and so.  I was stressing out to death (and I mean it...I found it's hard to breathe) but now I feel so light and I can breathe, well.  I guess this is like the first step of my life refinery :)  Until the next time.

Stay well and be well.
Love,
Jittra :)

First day blogging

Dear all,

I started this blog at work :)  How sneaky!

After the 34-ish odd years, through ups and downs rolling in circle (fact of life--nothing lasts forever, what goes up must come down, that kinda thing), it's true that many people have said happiness doesn't come with materials gained or fulfilling others' expections of you or trying to please others, etc.  I have been addicted to handbags (and they have to be brand-named) now I have a ~$5K one (made a vow to stop buying but still happily looking :), it doesn't make me happier (but helps me stop buying more).  I enrolled in a Ph.D. program, I am accepted and now writing 3 term papers (enjoying the discussion sessions but exhausted).  I am promoted to a more responsible position in a top-5 bank, starting in Nov. (fearing of the unknown--will the new co-workers be nice to me?)

However, lately I've been feeling so exhausted, so tired, uninspired, not to mention unhappy and empty.  The whole time I spend on those daily routines working hard, but ignoring my loved ones, affects me sooner than later (I'm grateful for my body that protests my mind actually).  This whole year has been stressful I haven't got a day off work.  7 days a week without enough rest, thinking that fulfilling those expectations from myself and others will make me a better person has been proved that it's definitely not working.

So here I am making my life refinery.  This is going to be an only serious post of me :)  The rest will be something I enjoy and something I would like to share.

As we all know, life is short, enjoy living your life :)

With love,
Jittra H. :)
xoxoxoxo